Carlo Lingiardi: August 2014

Saturday, August 30, 2014

AGAIN ON TRYING

I posted here in June that my insistent requests to try at least the perispinal Enbrel should have been understood simply as a test or clinical trial, especially given that nothing is ever predictable or sure in medicine (the guess-science).

What I feel it important to explain is that I did already several (medical) attempts with my preferred MD in Ventura, who really tried in many ways to at least reduce my back pain (sometimes labeled as neurologic pain) with a steroid spinal injection and several other meds (currently the Gabapentin with Methadone prescribed by a neurologist AND a pain specialist).

Then - still with the Ventura MD support - I tried to do very much HBOT also at different ATA pressures (higher than the usual and recommended standard) and after I jumped on the neurofeedback attempt that resulted - like everything else I had tried before - in zero/no improvement.

So let me know make the list of attempts:

spinal injection of steroids
HBOT
neurofeedback

Therefore, while I can now confidently say that none of these 3 previous attempts gave any improvement to me, I keep insisting to receive one decent reason for not giving to me at least a test with the perispinal Enbrel, but please don't tell me that it's dangerous for its side-effects to the immunodeficiency of the body when at least 400K people inject themselves every day to fight the rheumatic pain AND given that the perispinal Enbrel is recommended to be done with a shot of Minocycline, I hope to hear something completely new, that I never heard before.

While I was taught the harsh lesson not to ever threaten any MD, I simply say that IF & WHEN I will receive this treatment AND IF I will receive the benefits I've been talking about here for way too long, rather than sue any MD, I'll walk into your office with an appointment to receive a medical visit from you all, one by one. You be the judge of what you prefer between my personal visit and the lawsuit, no threats of any kind, just your own decision.

Monday, August 25, 2014

FORGIVENESS

I posted here before that I'm a survivor of a mortal bike accident (murder) who had a NDE during which I said to have made an agreement with Jesus Christ, but I must now say that my friend Iacopo (the 3rd hypothesis) was probably correct in saying that I said so only due to my growth and education in the very Catholic Italy.

In fact, I am now convinced to have agreed to remain alive for my (powerful) love for my children/treasures directly with God - since there is no difference between Jesus and "his father" God.

I recently realized that - as people close to me suggested already - I waste my energies in thinking to ways to punish those who make me suffer for no reason simply because they can, given their position of power and control over me.

Father Betto once told me that my suffering is like sharing the pains of Jesus Christ while on the cross and since I'm sure of the reality of life after death, I simply refer the "final judgment" and potential punishment to the infinite knowledge of our true God.

This doesn't mean at all, that I just refer my life and wellbeing to a distant future, I'm never going to give up my fight to re-conquer my rights of free man, it simply means that I'm done planning to hurt anybody for causing my pains, God will evaluate and decide where these souls will be spending their eternity. My main objective remains to make sure that my USA family will have the doors to heaven open, so that we will exist together again forever.

Tuesday, August 19, 2014

AGAIN ON JESUS/GOD

My reason to justify the amount of posting, thinking and emailing with real philosophers and even scientists, is only that in my NDE I had agreed with Jesus to survive an accident that would have murdered anybody else only for the love I have for my two children/treasures.

I find it interesting that I used to doubt that I had mentioned the love I have for my children rather than the love I have for their mother Michele, but when I visited my dad in Italy few months before he passed away I had a good discussion with him about this very subject and he taught me that no matter if your children are created inside the mother's body, the connection with the father is at least equal to that of the mother.

This honest talk I had with my dad truly changed my approach to life because it explained to me very well why I'm living again and why, while I'm in atrocious pain, just thinking to my daughter I can bear any amount of pain, no matter its strength or duration in time.

Moreover, this brings me to say that I figured out the reason why God made Himself human in Jesus Christ to be on earth to die crucified to expiate the sins of humanity.

For the longest time I couldn't understand why Jesus, our God would have chosen to die so painfully to forgive the sin to sacrifice chicken or pigs done by men to honor and conquer the goodwill of God the creator, but I very recently realized that God didn't die to expiate our sacrificing animals in His honor, BUT to expiate the tremendous powers of the brain that He gave to us humans, that - as everyone here already knows - we only use at a small fraction of its powers, is the "antenna receiver" to be in contact with Him and can do both wonderful miracles and/or terrible things happen to others.

I really hope not to express any blasphemy when I say that because of the hatred and mental powers of my former employer at Tecnica (its owner), I was practically murdered in the accident I had, but because of it, I was blessed to meet with Jesus (God).

Given that, science has been advancing so much with quantum theories both in mechanic and in physics, I hope that soon we humans will be able one day to control the powers and capacities of our brain to have humanity and planet earth live in a complete new dimension of existence.

Monday, August 18, 2014

MY PRIMARY JOB

I know that I often miss my time spent working as manager in footwear companies, I bet that my reason is that's what I did for almost 35 years, day after day, like washing your hands before eating a meal, it was truly a part of me and of who I wanted to be since I was a teenager.

What is not very clear however is that my true primary job used to be to take care, protect and provide all kinds of comfort to my wife Michele, who chose to be the mother of my treasures.

Given that while in a coma I had what today is called an NDE (near death experience) during which I supposedly made an agreement with Jesus to survive a truly mortal accident, I've been spending much time reading, learning about and talking by email with both theologians, priests, nuns and philosophers.

Because of my intensive focus in these areas, I feel comfortable to say - like real scientists have been saying recently - that what all religions on earth have been saying for thousands of years, or claim about the continuing of our existence also after our physical death (when our bodies cease to function) is definitely and scientifically true, or that it can at least be measured. Truthfully, this is strictly related to what has been my real job since I became a husband, then a father and that will remain my main occupation for as long as I am living, or that I take good care of my family, Michele and my treasures. Of course, while I love my children so much that I'm still alive (no matter the pain) for them, my heart of an Italian man always stays close to the one woman I picked out from around the entire world (from Italy to California) who helped me create my treasures, who will enable true eternity of existence to me in this living earth.

Sunday, August 17, 2014

FEARED DISCOMFORT

Other than posting this Youtube video with links to others, all I can add is that - after having watched some - you can give any idea to me of the reason why somebody wants to challenge with logic and objectivity all humans on earth have been taking for granted and chose to believe in, please do post a comment or send a note to me, because this is the exceptional case when I have nothing to say at all.

http://www.zeitgeist.com/

CLICK ON THESE LINKS TOO:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DfJ0H_qVdNM&list=PL81F9181299185E7E

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a36_CwzA0bk&list=PL3RDKMG9A0ghAyHAtNpnKSdNlOWZeThTw

Saturday, August 16, 2014

MORE BELIEVABLE NOW!

It looks like recently science (quantum physics and mechanics) has figured out what all religions of the world have been saying for centuries, or that there is life after death.

As a survivor of NDE I can surely say that I'm glad that my personal experience is supported completely by real scientists (not the worthless medicine guess-scientists) and while I put here few interesting links and few videos on this matter, I can only repeat my wish that my wife Michele might look at my blog sometimes and decide - based on the fact that this isn't something I make up in my (broken) mind, but it's supported by real science - that if she decides to help me we will be able to spend eternity together in the world of Afterlife, so here you go, enjoy!

Friday, August 15, 2014

UNBELIEVABLE!!!

I know that I'm going to talk about something I've written about here (maybe) too many times, however, my (damaged) mind still cannot believe how my very successful and full of love and joy life has turned out to be!

Basically since I first saw and fell in love forever with Michele (mother of my treasures and infinite love of mine) when in SFO, CA while earning my master in economics I tried as much as I could to take her back to this State, having a job, obviously.

I'm sure that the way I got to do this (in the middle of the OR show) I made so mad the president/owner of the company I was working for (Tecnica) that he started to hate me so much (in his plans I was going to become the president of the US subsidiary) that his very strong mind powers had me get into the accident with TBI.

What's really unbelievable for me and my (broken) logic is that not only I lost my new "dream job" in Santa Barbara, CA but I lost my entire family (both here in the USA and in Italy), all of the money I ever earned in my entire life of work PLUS any money that I'm supposed to receive for my disability, together with all and any of my constitutionally protected freedoms.

What makes me furiously mad is the fact that through a rather simple and inexpensive therapy using a federally approved medication in an "off-label" way (not yet FDA approved) I've been constricted to remain living all alone sitting on a wheelchair while partially receiving my disability money - that is shared with my (former) family in support of my treasures/children (yeah, right!) - with the total loss (besides my family and my own money ) of all the freedoms that this (still) great country has been protecting nonetheless with the Constitution.

Being an Italian born, I don't think that I need to say how much my blood has been boiling inside my veins and how many people I've been wishing to either strangle with my hands or go to hell for real, as they die!

Again, in my (broken) mind all of this situation of mine AND of my USA family, could easily be resolved if my (still) wife Michele could accept to live with me again, become my full conservator and help me in my (simple) rehabilitation! However, she is so scared of my forced absence that she obviously prefers to take care of our treasures, rather than work to rebuild a new life of success and comfort with my caring love protecting everyone from anything! Having become somehow someone who can predict the future I can only say that I was born like a freight train that nothing nor anybody can ever slow down or stop at all and I can predict that the only one who is going to ultimately lose this war we have been on is Michele, simply because she has been holding in her own sole hands the trigger to the atomic bomb that can forever end this war (just like it happened for Hiroshima and Nagasaki) but is too scared and mentally limited to take any action.

SOME MORE LINKS - AS USUAL - TO CREDIBLE WEBSITES:

Thursday, August 14, 2014

FEAR AND MY MD

It turns out that I'm told that I can't be visited by any MD anymore because they are all scared of me, so with the permission of my psychologist (deep throat swallower, whose mother turned around in her coffin when she learned of his sexual preference) I'm going to try to talk about this "fear of me".

In my (broken) mind, there are two types of fear, either physical (I punch you in the throat) or conceptual (challenges to both education and experience, so status).

While I refuse to believe that any of my MD's (who were all males), would ever be scared of a disabled patient constricted on a wheelchair and with a total left body side immobilized by hemi-paresis, however, I can try to imagine to have put them all in a complete panic for having shown in few words and a brief time that I do know way more than they do in their own "science" (of guessing), no matter how much experience they have accumulated in their plenty years of profession.

I too would be terrified if someone I'm dealing professionally with would be challenging my knowledge about something recent that I only heard about, especially if I had to swear that I would be exercising my profession by always being up-to-date in my field and to give the best possible care to my patients, or clients (who pay me for my time and knowledge).

Maybe it's here that my MD had all their hormones of self-protection and survival that made them "fire" me as their patient and all I can say that I do accept their getting rid of me, simply because their survival instincts have been right on the spot!

Tuesday, August 12, 2014

ABOUT THE B's

I'm little concerned with people whose first name starts with the letter B. because one is the boldly (who will soon die for brain cancer and whose soul will spend eternity in the solitude of our ever expanding universe) who dared to stick his cock between the Holy union (made by God in His house) between me and Michele, the other one is BV the "Catholic extremist" who used to be my full caregiver and abandoned me like every other woman in my life.

Since my hero son's name is Brent that starts with B too, I wonder how this unfortunate connection with other names starting with B. will express itself.

However, given that he has my same genes in himself and showed already what he's made out of, I want to believe that the fact that his name is Brent, won't ever give to him any weird or negative influence, he's a real Lingiardi after all and there's no B. that can ever play any role whatsoever in his behavior both now and in the infinite future.

In fact I do expect for him to make it easier for his mother to grasp the concept that we all would be have much better lives if she could accept my temporary physical disability and forgive herself for the immoral mistakes that her fear to having lost me (her loving protector) for a (too) long while forced her to commit. Given that she was never taught of the concept of forgiveness, that can be given to others or - more importantly - to herself, this truly isn't an easy task to bring to a full resolution, but since my Brent is a Lingiardi thoroughbred, I have no doubt whatsoever that he will win and overcome this "impossible-looking" task.

Monday, August 11, 2014

ROLES REVERSAL

I was born with several distinct characteristics, or attitudes: sense of ownership, self-confidence, sense of (giving) protection, very firm psychological balance that always helped me to make sense of every situation, even the craziest J.

It was very natural for me to be the head of household, father, husband and company president to always know exactly what to say and do, no matter the situation.

I believe that in part it is because I was born with these characteristics that I made my wife Michele always feel very protected and secure of her life, much like in the past my sister Anna never had to be at all concerned to be in any kind of public place with any fear or sense of defenselessness.

I think that is very ironic now that I'm disabled, and cannot be in my active role of protection from anything and anyone, that both Michele and Anna find themselves in the very unnatural position (for them) to be the ones who not only are supposed to try to protect me, but that they themselves must figure out all on their own how to recreate their feelings to be overseen by my protective strength.

As a result of both their complete inability to take care of my new and unpredictable needs, I'm incarcerated in a nice prison in Santa Barbara downtown and I've been forcing myself to let go of any expectation about their (unrealistic) capacity to ever do anything good or right for me, their invincible guard who not even death can beat!

I did some research about this reversal of roles in history and I understand that it has never been something done by choice, or if it was, it happened by mistake. However I want to give some feeling of confidence to Anna and to Michele, who - no matter their gigantic and immoral mistakes in my regards - can be sure that I'm not going to sit myself on some throne to judge them for their actions or any of their mistakes, my arms remain open to their hearts and my "protective wings" always ready to put out of business anything or anyone who might dream to take any advantage of "my women".

Sunday, August 10, 2014

I'M SORRY

Yesterday my mother called me by phone - as she has been doing every day - and told me that no way I could have talked with Jesus and on my side I was confused also by the fact that I had been convinced that Jesus was sending messages to me through messengers who were talking to me like they had known me since several years and by my own idea that it was simply my own logic and intelligence that was telling me things not normally visible or understandable.

To my own surprise last night I dreamt of Jesus telling me to do certain things with my blog, in fact I just erased forever my last post titled G…..damn…. and erased also few other comments about the Ph. D. who put me in this position.

In fact I'm going to now follow the advice of my conservator who told me that I should only put my energies into the very person who ruined my life and sadly this is exactly what I'm going to do from now on.

Besides the kid who ran me over and caused my practical death, the other person who has ruined my life is only my adored wife Michele, who has been telling to me every time she could that I just love her as a result of my injured brain, however when I think about the simple fact that I'm still alive only because of my love for my children, even if I was clearly warned that it would have been surely painful, I'm now certain that it isn't my own intelligence talking to me but the real Jesus Christ who must have some plan for me while I'm living (as my friend Pat has been telling to me).

In fact I think that I've talked enough already about the love being only human and God-given, so there is no reason why I shouldn't have it still for Michele, it has nothing to do with my injured brain, it's part of my soul and given that I was abandoned by her with my children and by the ignorance of my sister Anna, I'm sure that it's the reason that explains the poor psychological assessments I had done in my past.

Therefore, it's time for me to apologize to the last psychologist who had assessed me and had me imprisoned in conservatorship.

None of all that has happened to me in the last few YEARS could ever have happened if MY wife (still in front of God) would have stayed with me.

He (not my own intelligence) told me that I should at least try to convert her (yeah right!) especially given that real science and its methods are now able to demonstrate the existence of the soul (see links) and its immortality.

I would say that this truly is the biggest difficulty of all that I've been having since my return to living earth, because of the genetic make-up that Michele comes from, so I'm only hoping that her love for me can make this true miracle happen. Could anyone help me by telling to Michele of what I'm saying here please? I can give her contacts if you simply ask to me. Thanks!

Friday, August 08, 2014

CATHOLIC RELIGION

In my 7/28 post about the concept of Trinity, I already criticized the failures of the Vatican monarchy over the centuries, its firm belief in the literal understanding of what Jesus had said to Palestinian shepherds of 2.000 ago and with this additional post, I hope not to focus on myself any disappointment nor hate from "powerful people". I just want to say that as the real creationist I've become since my encounter with Jesus Christ while in a coma, I must admit that too often I say that Jesus self tells me something when in reality it's simply my brain with its logic that makes me understand something so deep and true that makes me believe that it cannot come from my own intelligence or logic both very injured (as stated by the "receiver"), so it must be coming from Jesus, given its accuracy.

However, I have recently realized that what God - the universal creator - did with us humans has been to give to us the brain, that I explained here already, no evolutionary theory can possibly explain (sorry Mr. Darwin), that can be like an antenna receiver to be in contact with Him and even make miracles take place (or what science has no explanation for nor they can be repeated), in fact we can at most map it - as the B.R.A.I.N. Obama sponsored project - is doing now, but nothing more. The only one thing that the "receiver" told me when I last saw him is that we still cannot "cure" anything in our body, in fact we can at most reduce inflammations or surgically remove diseased or broken parts in it and then we can just "hope" that the body itself will take care of closing/healing the cuts or activate its own healing mechanisms to be able to return to function again like before the infection, injury or disease (my reason to believe in Enbrel).

In short I simply want to say that whoever expects God to act for something being prayed for, is simply a fool, in the sense that God gave to us humans a brain that we can just use in a very limited capacity and that whoever can use at a fraction of % higher than others becomes either a "genius" or an eternal artist in its field and can make miracles happen (you know what they are).

Therefore, whoever says that it was God's will for anything good or bad to happen is simply a fool and I want to remind here about the importance of praying that while it cannot activate God to do anything being prayed for, it truly focuses our very powerful brain into the "creation" of what we pray for, so here too no God can be part of this.

In my injured foolishness I convinced myself that having the motor cortex in my brain injured, the rest of it (i. e. logic and intelligence) have been free to develop way more than the way they used to be, or of any other person.

Wednesday, August 06, 2014

LESSON LEARNED

I had to learn the lesson - in the hard way - that even if this country (USA) protects with the constitution the freedom of speech, nothing negative can be published in a (public) blog, even when objectively true and since as a person with an injured brain I lost all the legal rights that every individual is granted since birth in the country founded on individual freedoms.

My biggest mistake has been to bash several of my MD's by criticizing what in my own (injured) understanding is their not staying up-to-date with the most recent discoveries and use of medication in ways not officially sanctioned by the "god-FDA", in addition I obviously hit the nail right on the head by saying in my blog that someone is an homosexual and I truly risked to lose my source of living because I must have guessed right, I mean if somebody would ever say in public that I'm gay, I wouldn't really give it any thought even if:

My first cousin Vittorio has been homosexual since his early 20ies, has been living with a formerly married man - who even has a daughter - for several years and has written and published a book on homosexuality since the times of ancient Greece and I love him like the brother I never had.
I never cheated on my former wife Michele, even if I used to travel worldwide very often and I used to be approached by high-class prostitutes every time I was in Las Vegas for several days attending footwear shows.
I have been having since years email correspondence with former male business friends talking about male genitalia in very explicit ways.

When anybody puts these items together all that is probably derived from this, is that I'm surely an homosexual, however even if I was presumed to be that in public - as we say - I wouldn't give a crap simply because I have nothing to hide and enough self-confidence to continue my life like nothing like that was ever said of me.

Given that I haven't named anybody at all, I'm confident not to have broken any rule related to my lost freedom of speech.

Sunday, August 03, 2014

DUALITY

While on one side I cannot let go of the unique concept that the psychologist who dared to ruin my life doing a very bad assessment of my capacities - but who will pay dearly for that - concept about the fact that in this second millennium humanity still has no idea of what to do to heal, cure or repair the human body when diseased or injured (anywhere), I want to state here in public that the reason that the only woman I ever loved in my life and who gave birth to what I've been referring to as my treasures, gave to me to justify her refusal to live together again is just that because of my determination to at least try once the perispinal Enbrel would get her in trouble with the annual court date to defend my spending my own money to try to recover my mobility, that's so paramount to me and the quality of my life. What she used as the example of my hardheadedness to want to try it again and again is my foolishness with the HBOT, and on this I want to simply say that on one side I had no idea that the presence of pure oxygen couldn't help the brain (body) to heal itself in such a vast and deep trauma in my brain, BUT by trying to do this as much as possible it's very clear now the reason why I didn't receive the benefit I was looking for.

It's very true however that not only I haven't asked to do it anymore in a very long time, but it's also very true that doing so much of it even at higher ATA pressures has made my thinking, reasoning and logic way superior to what it used to be before my accident and to what's usual to people in general.

Something else I consider important for me to state here is that if Michele would "lower herself" to living with me again, I wouldn't be so determined anymore in having mobility again, in fact I think that the only one reason why Michele wants me to live away from her is that I'm forced to live on a wheelchair, so it goes even without me saying it, that the day I'll walk again I'll be with my family, working and travelling again like it used to be for many years, before…..

Therefore, while I do admit that if the perispinal Enbrel truly was the miracle that many newspapers report, it would already be FDA approved and every MD would be offering it for sure, so my several posts about the Big Pharma being the ultimate obstacle to its approval are just the venting of a frustrated TBI victim who has been abandoned by everyone around myself for the very high frustrations that I've been causing and that are just a fraction of mine!

I truly dream to be accepted by the love of my life (Michele) and be able to try 1 or 2 times (per. injections)what I strongly believe that could give me back my mobility that is really the key to have again the life I used to have and that Michele is very comfortable with.

Is there anyone out there able to help me have my life back?

Saturday, August 02, 2014

I ADMIT

Ifti here is the reason why my blogs have recently improved very much, have a sitemap and have become much easier to read and navigate. If you just go to his blog here below you can hire him to work on your blog too for a very reasonable cost, the exchange rate with Pakistan is still very advantageous with the $dollar, therefore to pay him for the work on your blog it's very inexpensive, especially when compared to what is available in the USA.

He can also work on Development, SEO, Designing, Blogging, Marketing, HTML 5 Projects etc. I've been working on my main blog (this one) by email with Ifti for several weeks and I've learned way more than I used to know, in addition I've made very much research in many other blogs and asked questions to other bloggers, so now I feel to have become an "expert blogger" myself too.

I therefore hope to drive to Ifti some good business through my blog very much because Ifti has made it very efficient in terms of Search Engine Optimization , so that no matter what search engine is used (Google, MSN Yahoo, etc..) my blog is listed in the search results very often.

I therefore want to help Ifti to expand his business by making this post about him because he truly deserves success going forward, he's smart and flexible that are very good characteristics for someone in business on his own, especially in a country where we have been sending our young soldiers to die and that as a result has a critical view of the USA.

Friday, August 01, 2014

LIFE AND DEATH

Today I would like to express some concepts about topics that have fascinated humanity since the beginning of time and say that many recent theories are right.

I start by saying that I believe in the existence of a God creator of this universe where we are with the earth (and maybe other universes too) and for me the proof that God truly exists - except that I met with Him - is that there are millions of other reasons that can prove it, both physical and of many other types, though - as I said - the God in whom I believe may not be Jesus, who spoke as if He was the son of God in order to be better understood by Palestinians shepherds more than 2,000 years ago, but is what created the universe from the Big Bang (or perhaps even earlier), and gave to mankind the brain that can not be explained by any evolutionary theory bu is simply a kind of receiving antenna that allows us to get in touch with Him and that - at best - we can use 10% of its capacity and when someone can use a small percentage points more than usual, miracles are made (what science cannot explain), or we have people like Einstein, Michelangelo or Beethoven.

So in a sense I do agree with those who say that the human brain is the true God. Then I put here below - as always - links to sites that specialize in the concept that man is eternal, through the existence of the soul that is in all of us even before we are born, and as such gives us a life that never ends, or is eternal and that certainly (now being proved with the most advanced quantum studies) does not stop with the death of the body, but that continues to exist with all the knowledge and experience gained while living, with its unique personality too.

Then I'd talk about what happens when you die with a specific state of mind (i.e. happiness and satisfaction or unhappiness and sense of guilt) but since I would need to give examples of people, whom I know very well and who surely would not like what I say, I just leave it at that.

Anyway I hope you can appreciate what I have found in support of what I say, that really fascinates me and makes me ask to myself why the heck I agreed with Jesus to remain alive to suffer like a dog for the love I have for my Lingiardi puppies that is "only" eternal and helps me to overcome my worst days (the "power of love" :).

In fact, sometimes I wonder if all these new studies and findings are real or just a fantasy invented by the fear of death that God has given to us humans to ensure that humankind continues to grow and has a guaranteed future.

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