As my readers here know I’ve been affected 24/7 by a form of pain that my current physiatrist has defined as “neurological pain” for having been unable to at least reduce it, in fact I’ve tried a large amount of prescription medications but lately I feel I’m stuck on morphine sulfate, that’s pretty much a drug that requires doctor’s prescription and safe storage in the house, I have developed however a different theory about my constant pain that surely no prescription medication can at least reduce and is very much consistent to what Jesus had warned me about when I chose to live for my treasures.Even if my pain affects a specific muscle and part in my back it’s all and only due to all the losses I had because of the accident with TBI.
Not only and simply, I lost the ability to earn a comfortable living with my work, passion and dedication but my role as the caring and loving husband I was set out to be my whole life with the attention to the care for my creatures that I now call my treasures, after Cornelia – Gracchi’s mother in ancient Rome.
So in my way of looking at this I don’t see nor hope that my pain could ever be treated or at least reduced, unless my wife and children return to live under my physical protection that’s all they have been missing from me, since my divorce forces me to pay to them a luxurious support that’s only monetary and takes in no absolute consideration that a husband/father can provide comfort and security beyond what a pile of money can ever do.
What’s even more aggravating of the inability of my real life companion to realize how much pain she’s been giving to me, herself and our treasures is that her unethical temporary lover has been taking full advantage of my condition of money giver without anything in return.
Sometimes I say that this B. has won the lottery of this century and of his life, but – I say – only until I fully win my fight over the impossible or he starts to run away NOW!!
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