MY TREASURES

My 2 treasures asked me very sincerely and tenderly not to move back to Italy to be closer to my family of origin.

Even if their mother was clearly unhappy that I had immediately promised to never leave them by moving very far, I’m very happy and proud of the strength of character of my own children for having asked me to do something that their mother doesn’t agree with.

I told her that she shouldn’t be concerned because my staying here means that I'm going to keep paying her to take my treasures where I live each Sunday.

I guess that her disappointment for me staying here comes from the fact that she knows very well the breed of warrior I’m made out of and that I’ll never stop putting on her face her selfishness and lack of morality, she’s a woman who replaced her husband of 15 years with his doctor and tried as much as she could to give to herself my wealth both earned with work and inherited from my Italian family.

My treasures have given the first sure sign of what she should expect going forward.

The law that best explains what’s going to happen is the “you get what you give” law and the complete absence of love and support that she’s been giving to me is what’s she’s going to be reciprocated with going on.

What my treasures are going to receive from me is the wealth of myself and my centennial family history that will help them succeed in all they will do (or make an effort to do) in life.

While I’m very happy now, I feel somewhat guilty too because I never even dreamed that it was because of what my treasures decided, that I could start my return to the happy and worriless life I’ve always had.

Once again my treasures show their true Lingiardi nature that will always be part of who they are and what they do.

Grazie, il vostro papà vi vuole tanto bene.

JESUS HAD TOLD ME

When I got out of the 2 months long coma I told to who was around me, my father and some good friends that I had talked with Jesus Christ who had asked me if I wanted to cross the river of death or return to earth alive, I’m told that I had chosen to come back to earth for my love for my children and that Jesus told me that I would have felt pain, in my own stupid simplicity I said that I thought that any pain can be controlled with some Tylenol. I later had to learn that nothing exists to diminish the pain to be replaced by a very beloved wife who took away with herself my children – who were the very reason why I chose to stay here – and the working/earning ability, that was very developed in me and had made it easy for me to have a very good career till then.

Now that I’ve overcome my atheism with the refusal to conceive the existence of a “good father God” I do believe in what I told to people then, what I still have big problems with is the idea that a sinner is going to spend eternity in hell. I’d much rather accept and like the idea that a sinner pays for his bad actions while still alive because the concept of pain for a soul is impossible for me to conceive. In fact in the Bible is written that whenever God is upset/mad to people He makes catastrophes happen that exterminate entire populations.

This is the God I like and I hope that He can listen to my prayers to punish that sinner/lover while he still is here on earth. A normal man like me would have real problems trying to explain a murder as a God-sent order; otherwise all the prisons would be filled with priests and monks.

The Jesus I talked with is going to help my ex-wife overcome her sense of guilt for what she has been doing to me, because He told me that guilt is the only reason that keeps us separated and my ex-wife has never been taught of the idea of forgiveness that’s so fundamental in Catholic education to free mind and spirit from earthly concerns.

MY DAD

When I was in Verona, Italy few weeks ago my dad gave me a talk about the end of his life.

He told me that he’s certain that a soul exists because he could see it leave the body of the many people he saw when they were dyeing and that he wants me to know that I’ve made him very proud in the way I’ve been living my life.

All I could say is that it’s not that I would wake up each morning with the plan to do something to make him proud of me, I actually always did everything the way I could imagine he would have done it himself, so if he’s proud of me he must be very proud of himself too because he is the one who gave to me the parameters against which measure the efficacy of words or actions.

He just got a surgery to repair the hip femur he had broken in a fall in his yard and much to everyone’s relief the surgery went well, now he’s going to have to do very much rehab to reinforce naturally both the bones and the muscles.

He told me that I’m the one who inspires him all the time because I’ve been fighting with everything I have to recover as much as possible my TBI, so we kind of agreed that even if he’ll have to use a wheelchair he’ll do it thinking of me all the time.

All I could say is that I’d rather have had my accident 40 years later because to be forced to be on a wheelchair “in the middle of walk of life”( or about 40y/o as D. Alighieri wrote in his Divine Comedy) is a nightmare that adds to the insult to have lost forever a wonderful wife who’s mother of my Lingiardi treasures who will never forget that I’m their real father, no matter what they are being forced to think.

I asked my dad to – if he dies – come to me as a soul and help me to walk again and believe even more that God is real, a father figure who cares for us all as His children, so no challenges we have in our lives are anything that we are unable to cope with.

My dad has done his surgery successfully so even if I didn’t need to see his soul I got back my faith in God, that just by itself is huge because only when you make the willing decision to believe in God you can be forgiven of all your sins and recover from anything.

Thank you dad, I’m glad you are still here with/for us and you encouraged my return to the Catholic faith.