I MISS YOU

I’ve been trying to understand – all by myself, since Michele never wants to talk with me about this – what might be the reason why she abandoned me (maybe forever), given that I've heard say that she’s scared of me I imagined that

I scared her very much when I was furious about my condition and I tried to end my life not just once, but 3 times with subsequent residence at specialized facilities for suicidal people.

Since not only she chose to live with our children/treasures on her own (but with my full financial support), but she has been trying to find a man who can marry her (with the excuse to give a stable family environment to our children), I've recently concluded that she’s just like me about my current disabled condition, meaning that as much as I refuse to think that nothing exists that can give back to me the full use of my body that much she can’t even look at me anymore, her mind jumps immediately to my athletic past and high level performance I got her used to.

It goes without me saying it that I miss her and our children too much to be able to express it in words, if someone would ask to me what I’d give to have my family back, sadly there’s almost nothing that I could offer to give, given that my accident with TBI had me lose all I ever worked, cared and wanted in my life, so I guess that unless I was asked for a piece of my body, I have nothing to give in exchange.

In addition the reality that I never can have any conversation of any kind with Michele (from the plenty hours of talks about future projects and dreams we used to have before my practical death) relegates me in what I call a “guessing position” because all I can do is to guess what she’s thinking by deciphering her one-word comments when I see her.

It goes without me saying it that if we could live all together again, I’m sure that my physical condition would already be much better than now and our treasures could have their real loving dad back again in their lives, rather than some puppet pretending to be a “father figure” as mandated by Michele. Can any of my readers suggest anything I can do to conquer again Michele’s heart as I did 25 years ago?

1. https://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20111122054312AA6HzwG
2. http://www.reddit.com/r/atheism/comments/1l0xie/i_miss_my_wife/
3. http://www.recover-from-grief.com/i-miss-my-wife.html
4. http://www.brainline.org/content/2010/09/healing-your-marriage-after-brain-injury_pageall.html
5. http://serendip.brynmawr.edu/exchange/node/1689