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Friday, May 02, 2014

I WILL NEVER GIVE UP


A part of the people who know me say that I have so much courage I could sell some to others, while another part brings up the fact that I had agreed with Jesus to come back here to life for the love (and responsibility) I have for my children.
Both parties are right in their own way, but what I’m convinced of, is that I’m here is simply because I’ve never been a quitter, certainly nothing came easy for me in life but from everything I chose to do, to the woman I chose to marry and have children with, it’s very easy to see that I never took the easy road to do anything in my life. In other words, once I decide that I want something or someone or do anything I go for it and never give up simply because I wasn’t born to be a quitter. What I find borderline sarcastic is that when I used to work as a top manager I became famous for never allowing anyone working with me to say the word “impossible” because it’s just the expression of laziness or weakness and I never wanted anyone lazy or weak if working for/with me.
The sarcasm is in the fact that I got the “impossible” injury to repair and obviously I can’t accept this expression of impotence, even when it comes from important and experienced neurologists.
In my logic if someone studies to become a doctor it is because wants to help people in need, so I think why the heck would someone want to specialize in the organ that’s “impossible to repair”? So for awhile I grouped neurologists with masochists because to me if someone chooses to have a profession that can’t give the satisfaction of seeing the fruit of the work done, there must be something very wrong or sick in the mind of that person.
My sister however patiently explained to me the importance and positive/healing effect of what neurologists give, but this doesn’t reduce my frustration to have one of them who wants to see me only few times a year “because I have no urgent needs”.
Actually I used to describe myself as the wounded victim on the side of the road bleeding to death, surrounded by plenty doctors who can’t do anything else but argue with each other about the amount and type of blood I need to be given as replacement. So in my way I’m fully bled out already because none of my experienced neurologists can tell me what to do to be able to walk.
In other words my inability to accept that nothing can be done for me is paired by my inability to accept to see doctors who gave up on their specialization when they chose it in the very beginning of their education.


Is anyone out there who doesn’t accept to give up and wants to join me in my fight for recovery? If you are there, don’t, make me wait any longer I’m a warrior who never gives up and is ready to fight at any moment.
  1. http://www.ted.com/talks/diana_nyad_never_ever_give_up
  2. http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/22-reasons-to-never-give-up/
  3. http://nevergiveuptraining.com/

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