You all
know very well (maybe
too well) that
having NEVER anything to do, I must apply my (still very awake and
productive) brain
in thinking of “reasons
why things happen to both me… and to others, so the other day I was
thinking to the reason why I “sanctified” my dad.
I remember
in fact what he told me few months before passing away (truly a passage as Jesus and quantum
physics demonstrate)
he told me that I did always make him proud to be my father and he never had
the thought to replace me with anybody else, then he started to list the
reasons why he was very proud to be my dad, all with examples of what I had
done - to that point - in my life.
I therefore
concluded that if he’s now in heaven isn’t only for his own sole doing, but very
much too because he had two children who are simply two great individuals. In
fact I
believe that both my sister Anna and I have turned out to be pretty good,
aside from the fact that we both made our mistakes that we both accept and try
to work around.
I believe
it to be mainly because of my dad that Anna and I always keep very clearly in
mind our objective, the path to
get to it and the determination it may be
required to be on that path in order to reach the goal.
Anna and I
have been very close to each other, I’d say more than just like any brother and
sister but as very close friends too, where I was – as men have been doing for
hundreds of thousands of years – the protector and caregiver of the woman,
while she’s been the individual comfortable in receiving my loving care (non-sexual, obviously).
Anna in
fact was my primary caregiver for all financial matters, however since our
father was passing over and our mother was understandably pretty desperate, Anna
had to support (all
alone/by herself) –
both our parents, in addition to taking care of her twin children – as
consequence she gave up on this important support, I’m convinced primarily
because her husband (my brother in law) didn’t do anything to both support his wife, nor me. I cannot say here
any of the plenty scenarios (examples) I’ve
been trying to propose to both in order to receive their help, no matter that I
used to have a wife who lived with me, nor I’m going to say anything about this
both because mentioned earlier (several posts in past months) and because too risky for my continued use of
my computer with internet access.
Anyway the
message of my today’s post is that nothing truly can substitute the care of
your family – no matter how much you can make your spouse a part of it – when times
get hard…..especially all of a sudden like in my case.
What’s keep
being hard for me is that regardless that our dad is in heaven already, our
mother is about to join him, but she’s terrified to pass on and calls me each
and every morning (her evening)
to share with me both her physical pain and terror to pass on. As for me – an NDE
survivor it really matters not anything I can tell her to quiet down, because “her
Carlo who’s always right and knows everything about everything” (as she always said and
still sustains today)
cannot win over her fear “to move on”
- https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/happiness-in-world/200910/overcoming-the-fear-death
- https://www.huffingtonpost.com/margaret-manning/overcome-fear-of-death_b_6767446.html
- https://www.theguardian.com/science/blog/2017/jul/25/we-fear-death-but-what-if-dying-isnt-as-bad-as-we-think
- https://www.wikihow.com/Overcome-the-Fear-of-Death
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